Are you ready to add a touch of tech-savvy humor to your day? Look no further.
In this blog post, we’re diving headfirst into the world of computer puns.
Whether you’re a working in computer based job, student, or simply someone who enjoys a good laugh, this collection of puns is sure to tickle your funny bone.
From motherboard mishaps to software, we’ve got puns that will make even the most serious sysadmin crack a smile.
So sit back, relax, and get ready to LOL at some byte-sized jokes that are sure to reboot your sense of humor.
Computer Puns – Top Picks
- Why couldn’t the computer play sports? It kept crashing.
- How does a computer get drunk? It takes screenshots.
- Old programmers never die. They just don’t C very well, or C#.
- Why did the computer go on a diet? It had too many cookies.
- Why did the computer go to therapy? It had too many bytes of emotional baggage!
- Why did the programmer quit his job? He didn’t get arrays.
- A SQL statement walks into a bar asks 2 tables if he can join them.
- What do you call a computer that sings? A-Dell!
- How does a computer ask for a hug? Can I CTRL + ALT + DELETE your emotions?
- If you steal my copy of Microsoft Office; I will find you: You have my Word.
- When data can’t drive, it takes the bus.
- What do you call a website that sings? A-utube.
- How does a computer flirt? It compresses its feelings into a zip file.
- How does a computer get a haircut? With Cntrl + Cntrl + C.
- How do you organize a space party? You planet.
- What do you get when you cross a computer and a tree? A root directory.
- How do you fix a broken website? With a mouse pad.
- Why did the programmer always wear glasses? Because she couldn’t C#.
- Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
- Why did the computer go to jail? It committed a byte crime.
- Why did the computer go to the gym? To get more megabytes.
- How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, that’s a hardware problem.
- Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
- What do you call a group of hackers? A circle of trust, CTRL + ALT + DELETE your privacy!
- What do you call a haunted computer? A spook-tor.
- Dead hard drives should be encrypted.
- I told my computer I needed a break, and it froze on me!
- Why did the computer refuse to turn on? Because it was feeling down.
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus!
- How do you organize a space battle? With star-teams.
If you’re a student you can also see teacher puns.
One Liner Computer Puns
- I named my hard drive “dat ass” so once a month my computer asks if I want to “back dat ass up”.
- What do computers and air conditioners have in common? They both become useless when you open windows.
- I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
- There’s a ship over there sending a DOS!” “Don’t you mean SOS?” “No, it’s a Sea Prompt.
- How am I with PowerPoint? You could say I Excel at it.
- What does a baby computer call its father? Data!
- I told my computer I needed a break, and it froze on me!
- I used to be a banker, but I lost interest.
- How does a computer get drunk? It takes screen shots!
- My computer’s keyboard and I are in a committed relationship. We’re always attached.
- Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
- How does a computer take a coffee break? It downloads Java.
- Why did the programmer quit his job? Because he didn’t get arrays!
- Why did the computer go to the eye doctor? Because it had a screen problem!
- I’m not lazy; I’m just on energy-saving mode.
- I told my boss we should get rid of unwanted redundancy. I got booted.
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus!
- I’m trying to Exchange my family. Meanwhile I’m maintaining a positive Outlook.
- Why is the keyboard crying? It’s feeling too emotional to take a screenshot.
- My boss wanted to know if I could change the DNS server settings. I told him ICANN.
- I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
- Why do programmers prefer dark mode? Because light attracts bugs.
- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta. What do you call a fake computer? An imac!
- I’m not anti-social; I’m just not user-friendly.
- What do you get when you cross a computer and a life coach? A self-help-ware program!
- How did the computer break up with its girlfriend? It said, “Sorry, it’s not you, it’s me. I think we need to Ctrl Alt Del this relationship.”
- I watched the NAS car. It was clear they had a hard drive.
- Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
- Why did the computer date a floppy disk? Because it heard that she was easy to read.
- I asked my computer how to boot faster and it said, “Try running!”
- Why did the computer go to therapy? It had too many bytes of emotional baggage.
- Why did the computer catch a cold? It left its Windows open.
- My wife wanted me to drop the kids at school. She knows I’m a master of drag and drop.
- Why did the computer keep sneezing? It had a virus!
Also see book puns.
Funny Computer Jokes
- A computer is like an old testament god, with a lot of rules and no mercy.
- The only problem with troubleshooting is that sometimes trouble shoots back.
- The best thing about a laptop is that it doesn’t get any heavier when you add more data.
- You cannot ‘unplug’ someone’s stupidity, but you can mute them on social media.
- When in doubt, hit ctrl+alt+delete.
- My computer has a mind of its own – mostly, it’s just a blank screen.
- I’m not anti-social, I’m just not user-friendly.
- Computers make excellent and efficient servants, but I have no wish to serve under them.
- How do you fix a broken website? With a URL-aid kit!
- Why did the computer go to therapy? It had too many bytes of emotional baggage!
- The biggest lie I tell myself is ‘I’ll remember that password.’
- Why did the computer squeak? Because it had a “mouse” problem!
- The internet is the only place where you can be famous and still make no money.
- Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
- If at first, you don’t succeed, call it version 1.0.
- I thought growing up would involve a lot more saving in ‘Save As’ and a lot less ‘Ctrl+Alt+Del’.
- Computers are like air conditioners – they stop working properly when you open Windows.
- My computer once told me, ‘Keyboard not found. Press any key to continue.’ I have no idea where that key is.
- A computer is only as smart as its user – and sometimes, not even that.
- I wish life had an ‘undo’ button like computers.
- A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
- Computers are like teenagers – you have to tell them everything multiple times before they do it right.
- A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do.
- Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems!
- I would make a computer joke, but I’m afraid I would just crash and burn.
- Why did the computer take a nap? For some byte-sized rest!
- My computer just beat me at chess. But it was no match for me at kickboxing.
- Why was the computer cold and lonely? It downloaded Windows 10.
- How does a computer go on vacation? By going offline!
- I told my computer to be more spontaneous. It scheduled a random restart every hour.
- Why was the computer cold and unresponsive? Because it left its Windows open!
- Why did the computer go to church? Because it had a lot of hard drive!
- I bought a computer that couldn’t speak English. Turns out, it was French Windows.
- What do you get when you cross a computer and a snake? A mistake!
- I have a great computer joke, but I’m still waiting for it to load.
- Why was the computer cold? Because it left its Windows open.
- I asked my computer for a joke and it replied, “Sorry, I’m not programmed for humor. I’ll stick to crashing.”
- I just asked my computer how long until dinner and it said it would calculate it.
- Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
- Why did the computer go on a diet? Because it had too many bytes!
- What did the computer do when it got sick? It went to its cyber-doctor!
- What is a computer’s favorite snack? Micro-chips!
- Why did the computer need glasses? It couldn’t C#!
- Why did the computer go to the doctor again? Because it still had a mouse!
- Why did the computer have trouble staying in a relationship? It kept falling for scams.
- Why did the computer break up with its printer? It wasn’t compatible.
- What do you call a magician on a computer? A peripheral visionary.
- What do you call a computer that sings? A Dell.
- What do you call a computer that sings? A-dell!
- What does a computer eat for lunch? A byte-size sandwich!
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus!
- Did you hear about the new virus going around? It’s called Microsoft Office.
- I’m trying to start a band with my computer, but we can’t find a good keyboard player.
- Why did the computer date a floppy disk? It couldn’t resist that magnetic attraction.
- Why did the computer go to jail? It downloaded some illegal software!
- My computer and I have a love-hate relationship. I love to hate it.
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus!
- What’s a computer’s favorite exercise? Jogglng its memory!
Q&A Computer Puns
- Q: Why was the computer cold and lonely? A: Its zip drive was broken.
- Q: What is it called when an IT person gets surgery on their fingers? A: Tech knuckle support.
- Q: How does a computer get in shape? A: By byte-ing and resting.
- Q: What do you call a computer that sings? A: A-Dell!
- Q: Why did the PowerPoint presentation cross the road? A: To get to the other slide.
- Q: Why was the computer feeling down? A: It had a hard drive.
- Q: Why do computers make such bad boxers? A: Their bark is worse than their byte.
- Q: Why did the computer refuse to turn on? A: It felt like it had a Dell-horableday.
- Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor? A: Because it had a virus!
- Q: Why was the computer cold? A: It left its Windows open.
- Q: What do you get when you cross a computer and a potato? A: A baked Mac!
- Q: What’s a computer’s favorite type of music? A: Heavy metal.
- Q: How does a computer feel after a long day of work? A: De-fragged.
- Q: Why did the computer keep freezing? A: It was caught in a screenshot.
- Q: How does a computer like its coffee? A: Ctrl + warm.
- Q: How do you organize a space party? A: You planet.
- Q: What’s a computer’s favorite drink? A: Java.
- Q: What do you call a laptop that turns into a dinosaur? A: A transformerbook!
- Q: Why did the computer sing at the birthday party? A: It wanted to give a byte!
- Q: Why did the computer spy get fired? A: She couldn’t hack it.
- Q: What is a computer’s favorite animal?A: A RAM.
- Q: Where do naughty disk drives get sent? A: Boot camp.
- Q: What’s the best day to buy a computer? A: Cyber Monday.
- Q: Why did the computer go to the party? A: To crash it.
- Q: What’s a computer’s favorite dance move? A: The floppy disk shuffle.
- Q: What’s the difference between a computer and an elephant? A: One is made of circuits, the other is made of circus.
Computer Spoonerism
- Goblin Clicks instead of Coding Glitches
- Fruity Snacks instead of Security Flaws
- Poppy Wrong instead of Wrong Copy
- Mouse Farm instead of Farmhouse
- Data Frenzy instead of Fata Drenzy
- Cyber Laughter instead of Laughter Cyber
- Laptop Hopes instead of Hopped Lates
- Social Media Error instead of Error Social Media
- Printer Fight instead of Fighter Print
- Wired Spire instead of Spire Wire
- Binary Blunder instead of Blinary Blender
- Cuter Puddle instead of Computer Power
- Screen Kohlrabi instead of Kohlrabi Screen
- Trojan Moose instead of Moose Trojan
- Memory Stealer instead of Steaming Reminder
- Pixel Court instead of Court Pickle
- Hacking Nerd instead of Nerdy Hack
- Motherboard Freak instead of Fother Mreakboard
- Virus Friends instead of Friendship Virus
- Byte Shaker instead of Shyte Baker
- Data Sentry instead of Sata Dentry
- Pixel Blunder instead of Bixel Plunder
- Wi-Fi Router instead of Ri-Fi Wouter
- Code Breaker instead of Bode Craker
- Server Down instead of Derver Sown
Knock Knock Computer Puns
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Facebook. Facebook who? Sorry, I can’t tell you that until we become friends.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Virus. Virus who? Virus infected your computer, time to call IT.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Siri. Siri who? Siri-ously, do I have to ask you to tell the knock-knock joke?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? C. C who? C:\DOS
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Error. Error who? Error 404: Joke not found.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cursor. Cursor who? Cursor to the bottom of this page and let’s finish this joke.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mac. Mac who? Mac-adamia nut, I could go for some cookies right now.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Java. Java who? Java broke my heart when my code wouldn’t compile.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Wifi. Wifi who? Wifi you always take forever to load?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? HTML. HTML who? HTML you like my latest website design?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Printer. Printer who? Printer out of ink again, time to go buy more.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Wi-Fi. Wi-Fi who? Wi-Fi you always knocking? Just come in!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Defrag. Defrag who? Defrag you glad I came to clean up your memory?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Browser. Browser who? Browser is another word for Internet Explorer, which no one uses anymore.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Password. Password who? Password123, that’s easy to hack.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Byte. Byte who? Byte to meet you!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Virtual. Virtual who? Virtual reality is the future, get with the program.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Control Freak. Control Freak who? Okay, now you say, “Control Freak who?”
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Blue screen. Blue screen who? Don’t worry, it’s just a Windows joke.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Microsoft. Microsoft who? Microsoft me go before I make another bad joke.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Google. Google who? Google my name and you’ll find out who I am.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Java. Java who? Java nice day!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Interrupting computer. Interrupting compt- (Error: Connection lost)
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Delete. Delete who? Delete this joke from your memory, it’s not very funny.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ctrl. Ctrl who? Ctrl+alt+delete to restart this joke.
You can also see engineer puns.
Conclusion
In this fun journey through computer puns, we hope you found lots of laughs hiding in the digital world.
From funny Windows jokes to clever coding humor, we saw how jokes can make tech stuff more fun.
So, as you use computers, remember to smile and enjoy the funny side of tech.
It doesn’t matter if you’re a pro or just starting out these puns show that laughter makes using computers better. So keep smiling, keep learning, and may your computer adventures always be filled with joy.